My heart has a desire...

My heart has a desire...

My heart has a desire to help.  I feel like sometimes I can't.  I try and try and try and I feel helpless at times. 

-When do you know when the Lord wants you to give up?? 
-Does He ever want you to give up??
-When you give it to God, do you really "give it to God" or does the flesh side of you take over at times and prevent you from really giving it away??

I feel like my heart desires the Lord to use me in the must powerful way but that I don't have the means to do anything.

I feel like I need money, but I know that I don't.  I feel like I need to know the bible inside and out to help the Lord use me to save a life, but I don't... right??!!?

Or wrong??!!?

I am struggling with not being able to drop everything and "GO & DO".  I want to drop everything and rush to the "scene" and lend a hand and share Jesus' love and build the house and feed the kid and dry the tears and reassure those who are afraid that God loves them...

But I have this job and this life and these things that I have to pay for and this debt and a place to sleep, but I feel like even though I have all of these worldly possessions... THEY'RE NOT ENOUGH.

My heart desires a connection so strong with the Lord that you have to talk to Him to get to me.  Is that so crazy??!!?